front of house (2023)

My recent body of work seems to have slowly turned into a case study for Sigmund Freud’s Object Relation Theory. As I have shifted the scope of my practice for the third time, I have begun a bout of self-actualized therapy. The course of this reflection has taken me on an exploration of traumas, relationships & community, Blackness, beliefs, stories, and ancestry. Each reflection begins the same way, I mentally walk through my childhood home and look at every object, detail, placement, and flaw of the space. An object triggers a memory, then forms a concept, which in turn, becomes an artwork.

The journey always starts at the front door—a burgundy painted door with a brass doorknob on the left and the numbers ‘611’ in a black textured plastic right above eye level. It sounds strange to say now, but I used to be afraid of this door. More so, I was afraid of anyone outside of that door. The horizon of my world stopped at the door, anything beyond that was alien to me.

Leaving that space and owning my own has made me very conscious of accessibly. Who has access to me? What do I have access to? Why am I being denied access? Is controlling access to myself, the ultimate form of my artistic curation?